Dear Yuri,
Some days, the gentle emptiness of our new routine is strangely comforting. The pressure, hustle and urgency has gone. It soothes a part of my soul I didn’t know needed to be soothed.
Some days, the emptiness is not gentle. The emptiness is aggressive, intimidating and overwhelming. I lose grip of my thoughts and fear takes the wheel.
Some days crush me like a wave of emotion. Frustration from the feeling of helplessness. Anxiety over things I cannot control. Fear of what is yet to come. Despair…that nothing will come at all. Sometimes, I fight these days. Other times, I melt into them.
But some days, I do not melt.
Some days I shout beautiful sunshine! after looking out of the window. I smile at the masked strangers and enjoy the look of surprise in their eyes. I laugh with the people I love. I cry with joy when I see a familiar face. I rest. I sleep. I dream.
Some days are terrifying.
Some days are good. In hushed tones, maybe even great.