Dear Yuri,
I feel guilty really. The world is being torn apart and I am actually having a lovely fucking time. Does that make me a bad person? Or just lucky? I mean, this is going to change for me soon, when schools are fully back, but day to day I am finding I am less stretched, less stressed, less anxious about trying to be a million things to a million different people. I am a key worker, still working but the focus of my role is sharper and more specific. My working hours are greatly reduced meaning I actually get to spend some real, quality time with my daughter.
Maybe it is because of where I live. I have always loved the town but right now it feels like a beautiful bubble. The holiday homes are shut and the locals are still doing what they love and it all comes free; surfing, dog walking, sea swimming and bike riding (all socially distanced of course). Don’t get me wrong, I miss my mum and dad. I miss my friends. I want to get pissed in the pub at lunchtime. But I don’t want to go back to real life yet.
Obviously, there is always the omnipresent worry that creeps in. Will we stay well? Will my little girl be ok? My mum and dad? But I try and remember what I can and cannot control. I still have to work and mix with a team and children but I can wash my hands, ensure we are social distancing, rota on minimal staff. I don’t have to use public transport. I don’t watch the news.
I bury my head in the sand and that is good for me right now.