Dear Yuri,
It’s only when I step back now that I really start too see,
How much I’d been focused on other things, rather than just being me.
Uneasy guilt lies in the pleasure of a situation I shouldn’t enjoy,
But I want to stay home, be at peace,
I want to find my voice.
Mum and Dad are telling me I need to see my friends,
‘Because how on earth will you cope with college when lockdown finally ends?’
I don’t know, is my only answer.
Or maybe now I do.
I need to take time out for me,
And not feel guilty about it, too.
For 12 years now I’ve been in school,
been forced into mould after mould,
and now I’ve had this time to myself I’ve realised that I can and I need to be bold.
I can be my own person and stand my own ground,
Speak out on injustice and be fucking proud.
Because classrooms and rule books told me how I should be,
But this time to myself has taught me to be me.